Both sexes want to make a great first impression, so you would think everyone would be on their best behavior on a date. Unfortunately, this isn’t always the case.
It is important to understand how you come across to others. Are you friendly? Are you confident and respectful? Apart from physical attraction, what other attributes stand out and make a woman take notice?
Many people are dating online and don’t spend much time investing in someone who shows up in their feed. There’s a lot of swiping going on if the attraction isn’t immediately there. Sadly, a lot of men and women are being overlooked due to this approach.
When a first date is established, this is a positive sign that both people are interested in meeting each other. Getting to this point is the most difficult step regarding dating. Let’s now talk about how you can stand out as a man to pique a woman’s interest on a first date.
#1 – Women really appreciate it when a man follows up by confirming the date before the actual meetup takes place.
By letting a woman know where she will be going on your date, she can then plan on dressing for the appropriate theme. If you’re taking a woman hiking or on a scenic walk, she needs to know that she should dress in fitness attire. Compromising on a time that works for both of you is also appreciated.
It is also great dating etiquette for you to choose a venue or area near her home so she doesn’t have to travel a long way to meet up with you. Many women prefer the independence of having their own car, or other transport on the first date. This is something I always advise women to do primarily as a safety precaution.
#2 – It is important for a man to put some effort into their appearance.
Most women take extra care of their appearance when getting ready for their date. It goes a long way when a man makes the same effort and puts in the energy to look nice as well. First impressions make lasting impressions and can make or break a second date.
She likes to know that you care enough to put your best foot forward because you’re excited to meet her. Showing up in your sweatpants or straight from the gym does not give the impression that you care at all. If you want to get a woman’s attention, show her your best side. Not putting in any effort to look attractive for her is a big turn-off, and can come across as cocky or apathetic.
#3 – Late arrival or last-minute cancellation can be a dealbreaker for most women.
This is one disappointing scenario that happens way too often. Timeliness matters and is important “dating etiquette” to be adhered to. Everyone’s time is valuable, and no one should be left waiting for their date to show up due to this disrespectful action. Plan your date accordingly so that you allow more than enough time to travel to your destination.
There are way too many stories of dates showing up an hour late, being cancelled with a last-minute text, or being completely ghosted without a word. It’s very hurtful to be on the receiving end of this behavior when it’s a regular occurrence. This shows disrespect and selfishness. She has a choice of who she dates, and she chose to spend time with you, so please honor that.
#4 – Ensure the conversation is reciprocated and make her feel comfortable.
Dating can be scary, and some women may be nervous about going out with someone they’ve never met. Ensuring she is comfortable without any pressure or intimidation is so appreciated by her.
Start the conversation by telling her a little bit about yourself, and then switch it up by asking her a question that gets her talking. When a man shows interest in what she has to say, it not only makes her feel heard, it shows that he wants to get to know her better.
Make certain that the conversation is shared, and be mindful not to sound like you’re giving a sales pitch pointing out all your best qualities. Please leave any high-maintenance checklists out of the discussion as well.
I remember one lunch date I went on years ago. I was not asked one question about myself or anything else. I knew all about him, but he knew nothing about me. He asked me out again for a second date, and I told him I didn’t feel there was a balanced connection. He asked me what I meant by that, and I said, “You didn’t share any of the conversation with me during our entire date. You talked, I listened.” The fact that he was very defensive and disagreed that he was doing that, told me a lot about who he was.
#5 – Women love it when a man can make her laugh!
Humor is a big turn-on for many ladies. It also helps her relax during the date. First dates can often come across as too serious, or feel like an interview! If you can add some playfulness and witty banter, you will definitely be getting a second date. Laughter alters the mood’s ambiance and brings a reciprocated comfort level, allowing you both to loosen up and be yourselves.
#6 – First dates don’t have to be expensive!
As a man, if you choose to take your date to an expensive restaurant, be prepared to pay for the meal. I have seen many scenarios where there is an assumption that you will both pay your share at the end of the meal. If this venue is your decision for the first date, then please don’t make it uncomfortable when the bill comes. You don’t know her financial situation and what she can afford.
Not all women expect to be wined and dined, especially on the first date. If you are only attracting women who have these expectations, then it is always a good thing to revisit your dating choices. There are plenty of wonderful women who want to meet a great guy and get to know him. They are not just interested in his wallet.
On a personal level, I feel it’s less stressful to go out for coffee or a nice walk when you first meet someone. I never liked having the pressure of money issues on the first date. For me, it was always more about getting to know the person and seeing if there was a connection. There would be plenty of time for romantic dinner dates after that time frame if we were compatible.
Make the first date a fun place where you can both be comfortable and let down your guard. The atmosphere shouldn’t be stuffy or pretentious. You want a warm environment where you can both relax. I don’t suggest taking her to a movie or a music venue where you can’t talk to one another. First dates should be about focusing on each other without distractions, to find out more about one another.
#7 – Avoid discussing sex on the first few dates!
Sorry guys, but too many of you make this mistake far too early, and women feel very disappointed that sex is your top priority. We know that you are sexual creatures, and you need to have a great connection in the bedroom, but it is a wonderful idea to find out if you have compatibility in other areas as well.
I think by now that most men know that many women become emotionally attached after they sleep with you. This can cause early expectations that men are not ready for. So, it is in everyone’s best interest not to jump into bed on the first or second date to avoid unnecessary confusion. Slow down and see if you even like each other first!
#8 – Despite feminist changes over the years, many women still enjoy gentlemanly qualities
I understand that men are often confused and unclear about what women want, and what they don’t want when it comes to dating today. When in doubt, do what you are comfortable with. If you want to open her car door, put your coat around her shoulders when she is cold, or pull out her chair in a restaurant, go for it.
You want to meet someone who is on the same page as you, so just be your authentic self. If she is offended by your actions, you can then decide if you want to ask her out again or walk away at the end of your date. This is why we date, to see if there is a compatible connection as well as having wonderful chemistry.
#9 – There are definite behaviors to avoid on a first date with any woman.
It’s great etiquette to “treat someone how you would want to be treated.” This is a popular cliché for a reason. Whenever in doubt about what to do on a date, ask yourself how you would want to be treated. What would make you happy?
Eye contact is extremely important. Women are very aware when your eyes are wandering around the room. She wants to know that your attention is on her and that you are showing interest in getting to know her.
Be careful about how personal your questions are. Not all women are comfortable answering some of those tough inquiries you are so boldly rattling off on the first date. Asking for or giving out too much information, too quickly, can be overkill and also come across as aggressive. Leave a little mystery for the second date. Be natural and don’t try too hard to make them take notice.
#10 – How can both men and women make a great first impression and continue to improve their dating experiences?
- The most important thing for both men and women is to be your authentic self.
Show each other who you really are without any games or pretense. Prioritizing your time with each other in a reciprocated manner will also be greatly noted. Both sexes need to pay attention to the red flags and the green flags. You’re not going to connect with everybody, but respecting yourself first goes a long way to making the right choices.
- Women appreciate confidence and honesty.
If you’re enjoying the date, tell her. If you don’t sense that there is a compatible bond, let her know at the end of the date that you didn’t feel there was a solid connection between you. Be gentle with your delivery. It might sting a little bit a first, but she should be aware of how you feel early on, rather than being put on hold thinking she may see you again.
- Both sexes need to understand that you won’t mesh with everyone and that is OK!
This is a big part of dating that can be difficult not to take personally. This is why we date, to see if there is a reciprocated connection and maybe a potential partnership. You’re not going to fall in love with everyone and finding your life partner isn’t going to happen without a few tough lessons along the way.
No one said every dating experience should be an easy accomplishment, but treating each other with kindness is always the best approach, regardless of how things turn out. Rejection is much harder to deal with when there’s no discussion, or you are left to try and figure out what happened on your date and why you weren’t contacted again.
- Be careful that you are not being too quick to judge someone on a first date.
Many women are a little nervous on the first date, so it is always advisable to go on a second date to give things a chance. Of course, if there was a complete disconnect with how you felt toward her, then it is always better not to make empty promises. Listen to your instincts over your itemized checklist. We often don’t even know what it is we are looking for in a partner until they are staring us in the face a few dates later.
- Valuable insight comes out of our dating experiences.
This is a good thing for the most part, even when you are repeating negative dating patterns that continually don’t work out. You are still learning what you don’t want in your life and each scenario brings you that much closer to finding your special person. Owning your part in what needs to be altered, is the key to embracing those necessary changes you can make, to bring you the love you deserve. Pleasewatch the video above to hear more on today’s topic!
Thank you, Sybersue xo ❤️
Private Dating Relationship Coaching With Sybersue – Don’t hesitate to get in touch with me @ dearsybersue@gmail.com and message me there to set up a video or audio appointment within 24 hours. Thank you!
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